Trying to be someone other than yourself will never amount to anything but frustration, disappointment and failure-So why do we keep trying? Why are we taught to just do what is expected and not be who we are — across the board in our culture, our schools and at work?
As a young child with dreams and creativity, we go off to school where we are taught to be like everyone else -following the program. Yet, true learning that makes a lasting difference comes from within each of our own unique talents, gifts and passions. But, who in our schools, companies, or lives asks us anything about who we really are and what we want?
So, why do we continue to follow what everyone else thinks is best? We have learned to fulfill some outside standard from a very young age –Where leaders set our goals-without a word from us. Leaders who are there to guide us–but for what purpose?
In fact, before most of us were even born, we were expected to fit into some mold. If we could be like others, achieving external goals, we earned a mark of excellence and approval. Then we grew to believe and perceive that this is the mark of excellence in all areas of life. Now, we press on-striving to win and overachieve.
Today, this is how many business leaders see success. Yet why do many businesses fail, and so many struggle with retention? Why is the U.S. seeing a decline in corporate America? Why do I coach business leaders and teams who all really struggle with the same root cause? For it does not matter the industry or role. It comes down to that fact that each person matters and longs to be who they are–wherever they are. But this is not really accepted as excellence or success.
Most people would say that they are stressed and want to get off the treadmill that leads to nothing but fear, emptiness and broken relationships. Many are so exhausted and lost in knowing who they are and what to do next. Some think that changing jobs, until they find the “right fit” is the answer. So, in search of another company or position, many have hopes of finding some relief. Yet most do not. As a Leadership Coach, I hear this daily, across the board.
The ANSWER: When we can find our true calling, unique purpose and gifts-we can truly fulfill greatness–in life and work. When we rediscover and embrace our uniqueness, we have joy and peace! Ultimately, aligning what we do most of the day with who we are brings results that are far superior than just meeting goals. Companies who value each person –who they are –not just what they do, are the rare companies who have outrageous success and loyalty.
Be you. Honor yourself and others. Live your purpose and shine from the inside out. Focusing on your intrinsic motivation not the extrinsic is the heart of it all. Contact me, if you need to make a true life/work change that values you. Get back to being you–your ultimate success.